299+ Top Dumbest Jokes That’ll Make You Laugh 🤪

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In a world where everything is getting smarter—from AI assistants to self-driving cars—sometimes, what we really need is the exact opposite: a moment of pure, unfiltered silliness. That’s where dumb jokes come in. They’re timeless, endlessly relatable, and surprisingly trending again in 2025 thanks to platforms like TikTok, Instagram Reels, and YouTube Shorts, where people are proudly sharing their most ridiculous, laugh-out-loud lines.

But don’t be fooled by the name—dumb jokes are actually smart in disguise. They play on wordplay, puns, and unexpected punchlines that catch you off guard. The beauty of a “dumb” joke is that it doesn’t try too hard. It just is. It’s the kind of joke that makes you groan, roll your eyes, and then chuckle for way longer than you’d care to admit.

Whether you’re looking for a funny icebreaker, trying to lift someone’s spirits, or just need a reason to smile at your screen, you’ve landed in the right place. From one-liners to dad jokes, from totally ridiculous to surprisingly clever, this updated list of 299+ top dumbest jokes is your go-to arsenal of giggles and goofy grins.

Dumbest Jokes Dirty

  • 🚽 What did one toilet say to the other? “You look flushed!“
  • 💩 Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? To get to the bottom!
  • 🧻 Why don’t toilets ever get invited to parties? They always flush out the fun.
  • 🚿 Why did the soap feel lonely? Because it was always squeaky clean.
  • 🛁 What did the bathtub say to the shower? “Stop dripping on me!”
  • 🦠 Why did the germ go to the toilet? To spread itself around.
  • 🕳️ Why was the drain so popular? It had a sucky personality.
  • 🧼 What’s soap’s favorite dance? The bubble bop.
  • 🧽 Why did the sponge break up with the sink? It was too absorbing.
  • 🚪 Why did the bathroom door go to therapy? It couldn’t handle being slammed.
  • 🪠 Why did the plunger get promoted? It always knew how to get to the root of the problem.
  • 🔑 Why did the bathroom key never get lost? It always stayed in toilet-paper.
  • 🕳️ Why did the peephole blush? It saw something it couldn’t unsee.
  • 🧻 Why do bathroom jokes never get old? They always wipe you away.
  • 🤭 What do you call a mischievous bathroom? A looser.

Dumbest Jokes Ever

  • 🐔 Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!
  • 🍌 Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well.
  • 🥚 What did the egg say to the frying pan? “You’re hot, and I’m egg-cited!”
  • 🚗 Why don’t bicycles stand up by themselves? They’re two-tired.
  • 🥔 Why did the potato sit in the sun? It wanted to be a baked potato.
  • 🌭 What do you call a sleeping hot dog? A pup-per.
  • 🛹 Why did the skateboarder get arrested? For board-erline behavior.
  • 📚 Why are ghosts bad at lying? Because you can see right through them.
  • 🐑 Why did the sheep run away? It was ewe-nerved.
  • 🍞 Why did the slice of bread break up? It felt crumby.
  • Why did the alarm clock apply for a job? It wanted to wake up its resume.
  • 🩲 Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
  • 🦀 Why don’t crabs give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
  • 📱 Why did the smartphone need glasses? It lost its contacts.
  • 🎒 Why did the backpack go to school? It wanted to be well-rounded.

Dumbest Joke of All Time

  • 🙈 Why did the monkey like the banana? Because it had appeal.
  • 🥚 Why was the egg so good at basketball? It had egg-cellent dribbling skills.
  • 🐠 Why don’t fish do well in school? They’re always below sea level.
  • 🪐 Why did the sun go to school? To get a little brighter.
  • 🌳 Why did the tree take a nap? It was bored stiff.
  • 🔌 Why don’t plugs ever lie? They’re always current.
  • 🧀 Why did the cheese stay home? It felt grate-ful.
  • 🎂 Why did the birthday cake cross the road? It was on a roll.
  • 🏔️ Why don’t mountains get cold? They wear snowcaps.
  • 🌧️ Why did the raindrop go to therapy? It felt under pressure.
  • 🍎 Why did the apple stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
  • 🎨 Why did the painter retire? He had too many brush offs.
  • 🌟 Why don’t stars use GPS? They like to shine on their own.
  • 📦 Why was the box so humble? It knew how to think outside.
  • 🥤 Why did the soda break up with the ice? It found them too cool.

Dumbest Funniest Jokes

  • 🤓 What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
  • 🐟 Why are fish so smart? Because they’re school-ed.
  • 🦆 What do you call a duck that likes making jokes? A wise quacker.
  • 🍵 What did the tea bag say to the boiling water? “I’m steeping around!”
  • 🚦 Why did the traffic light turn red? You would too if you had to change in front of everyone.
  • Why was the calendar popular? It had a lot of dates.
  • 🥨 What did the pretzel say to the bread?Twist and shout!”
  • 🥊 Why did the punch go to school? To improve its punchlines.
  • 🎹 Why couldn’t the piano finish its homework? It lost its keys.
  • 🌮 Why did the taco blush? Because it saw the salad dressing.
  • 🎈 Why did the balloon go near the needle? It wanted to pop off.
  • 🥜 Why don’t peanuts tell secrets? They’re always in a pod.
  • 🥚 Why did the egg go to school? To become egg-ducated.
  • 🦑 Why did the squid blush? It saw the ocean’s bottom.
  • 🐸 Why are frogs so happy? They eat whatever bugs them.

Dumbest Best Jokes

  • 🏖️ Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
  • 🐻 What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
  • 🍩 Why did the donut go to therapy? It felt hole-y.
  • 🦉 Why don’t owls take tests? They’re already wise.
  • 🏠 Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon? It was outstanding in its field.
  • 🦒 Why are giraffes so slow to apologize? It takes them a while to stick their necks out.
  • 🎻 Why did the violin get arrested? It was stringing people along.
  • 🥋 Why did the karate student quit? He couldn’t chop it.
  • 🥞 Why do pancakes never win races? They always get covered in syrup.
  • 🎤 Why did the microphone get promoted? It had a powerful presence.
  • 🧩 Why did the puzzle quit? It was too piece-ful.
  • 🐌 Why don’t snails like fast food? They can’t catch it.
  • 🦜 Why do parrots repeat everything? They parrot-ticipate.
  • 🍉 Why did the watermelon get married? It found its melon.
  • 🚴 Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.

Dumbest Age Jokes

  • 👶 Why don’t babies tell jokes? They can’t stand yet.
  • 👴 Why don’t seniors play hide and seek? Good luck hiding from everyone!
  • 🎂 Why did the birthday cake go to the gym? To get more layers.
  • 🧓 Why do grandparents smile all the time? They can’t hear a word you say.
  • 🏫 Why don’t teachers tell age jokes? They’re afraid they’ll grade you badly.
  • 🕰️ Why don’t clocks get invited to parties? They watch everything.
  • 🎓 Why did the college student bring a ladder? To reach the high education.
  • 👵 Why did grandma bring string to the bar? To tie one on.
  • 👦 Why didn’t the teenager finish the math test? It was over his head.
  • 🧒 Why don’t kids eat clocks? It’s time-consuming.
  • 🏡 Why did the retiree become an archaeologist? To dig up old memories.
  • 👮 Why did the cop retire at 65? He was out of charge.
  • 🏆 Why do winners act young? They never grow old at heart.
  • 🎒 Why do kids carry old backpacks? They’re full of memories.
  • 📅 Why do calendars always look forward? Their days are numbered.

Dumbest Boat Jokes

  • Why don’t ships ever get lost? They follow their buoy compass.
  • 🌊 Why did the boat apply for a job? It wanted to make some current money.
  • 🚤 Why don’t speedboats gossip? They prefer to keep things below deck.
  • 🛥️ Why did the yacht blush? It saw the harbor naked.
  • 🛶 Why did the canoe get grounded? It couldn’t paddle back to shore.
  • Why did the anchor break up? It couldn’t hold the relationship.
  • 🐟 Why don’t fish use boats? They already have their own school bus.
  • 🚣 Why was the rowboat so humble? It always stayed oar-ganized.
  • 🦭 Why did the seal buy a boat? To have a sea-nic view.
  • 🌅 Why do boats love sunsets? They always get the best view.
  • 🦭 Why did the boat get detention? For pier-cing the rules.
  • 🛟 Why did the lifebuoy break up? It felt tied down.
  • 🔧 Why did the ship go to the mechanic? It had an engine-ine problem.
  • 🏝️ Why did the boat go to therapy? It couldn’t handle the waves of emotion.
  • 🐙 Why don’t octopuses captain ships? Too many arms to manage.

Dumbest Joke Book

  • 📖 Why did the joke book go to school? To improve its plots.
  • 🏷️ Why did the bookstore reject it? It was full of cheap laughs.
  • 🔖 Why did the bookmark refuse to move? It couldn’t stand the suspense.
  • 📚 Why did the librarian blush? She saw the novel jokes.
  • 🖋️ Why did the author cross the road? To get to the punch line.
  • 📓 Why did the diary refuse to open? It was too closed-minded.
  • 📑 Why did the index file file for divorce? It found too many references.
  • 🗂️ Why did the binder get promoted? It always held it together.
  • 📔 Why did the notebook start a band? It had all the notes.
  • 🗞️ Why did the newspaper go broke? Too many issues.
  • 🖨️ Why did the printer get in trouble? It couldn’t stop jamming.
  • 🖊️ Why did the pen get fired? It lost its ink-centive.
  • 📇 Why did the card catalog feel outdated? It couldn’t file with the times.
  • 🗞️ Why did the magazine get called out? It had too many circulations.
  • 📦 Why did the package refuse to ship? It had too much baggage.

Bearded Dumbest Jokes

  • 🧔 Why did the bearded man bring a ladder? To reach the high notes.
  • 🪒 Why did the beard go to therapy? It had split ends.
  • ✂️ Why don’t beards play hide and seek? They’re always stubbly found.
  • 🔥 Why did the beard feel hot? It was in a hairy situation.
  • 🐻 Why do bears have beards? To look more bear-able.
  • 🥸 Why did the hipster grow a beard? It was mainstream enough.
  • 🧴 Why did the beard oil break up? It couldn’t smooth things over.
  • 🎩 Why did the bearded man wear a hat? To top off the hairy look.
  • 📸 Why did the beard get a modeling contract? It had great coverage.
  • 🧊 Why did the beard hate winter? It got frost-bite.
  • Why did the bearded barista get fired? His foam was too foamy.
  • 🧊 Why did the beard carry ice? To keep its cool.
  • 🧪 Why did the chemist grow a beard? For extra reactivity.
  • 🕶️ Why did the beard wear sunglasses? It didn’t want to beard the sun.
  • 🚀 Why did the astronaut grow a beard? To space out.

Funny Dumbest Jokes

  • 🎉 Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
  • 🦇 Why did the vampire get hired? He had a killer résumé.
  • 🌽 Why did the corn stalk break up? It needed some space.
  • 🦒 Why don’t giraffes use computers? They’re afraid of laptop-neck.
  • 🐌 Why did the snail cross the road? To see the shell-ebration.
  • 🌮 Why did the taco go to therapy? It couldn’t handle the salsa feelings.
  • 🚀 Why don’t astronauts eat fast food? They can’t catch it in zero-G.
  • 🥚 Why did the egg go to a party? To crack everyone up.
  • 🐶 Why don’t dogs make good dancers? They have two left feet.
  • 🐓 Why did the rooster skip breakfast? He was egg-shausted.
  • 🦕 Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens weren’t invented yet.
  • 🐝 Why do bees have sticky hair? They use honeycombs.
  • 🦔 Why don’t hedgehogs share? They’re a bit spiky.
  • 🌶️ Why did the pepper turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
  • 🍿 Why don’t popcorn jokes work? They always butter you up.

Conclusion

Laughing at dumb jokes reminds us that sometimes, the simplest humor is the most infectious. Even a groan-worthy pun can spark a grin and lighten the mood. 😄

No matter which category you loved most—be it dirty, boat, or bearded gibberish—remember that fun doesn’t always need to make sense. So share these ridiculously silly jokes with friends, family, or anyone in need of a quick laugh. Stay dumb, stay happy, and never underestimate the power of a cheesy one-liner! 🎈

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299+ Top Dumbest Jokes That’ll Make You Laugh 🤪

Ready for more groan-worthy fun? Here are 13 fresh categories of the dumbest jokes you can imagine—15 in each—for a total of 195 new one-liners guaranteed to make you snort, chuckle, or roll your eyes. Let’s dive in! 🚀

Imagine Dumbest Jokes

  • 🧠 If your brain was dynamite, there wouldn’t be enough to blow your hat off!
  • 🌳 Imagine a tree that tells jokes; it would always be barking up the wrong punchline!
  • 🚀 Imagine an astronaut tripping; that’s one small step for man, one giant faceplant for mankind!
  • 🦄 Imagine a unicorn without a horn; it’s just a very majestic horse!
  • 🥽 Imagine a fish with glasses; it still wouldn’t see why you walked into that wall.
  • 🛸 Imagine aliens learning jokes; they’d abduct us just to hear our human humor!
  • 🎩 Imagine a hat that could talk; it’d just yell “You’re not wearing me right!
  • 🍦 Imagine ice cream with feelings; it’d get cold feet in the freezer.
  • 📱 Imagine your phone telling secrets; it already knows everything about you!
  • 🎈 Imagine a deflated balloon telling jokes; they just don’t pop like they used to.
  • 🌶 Imagine a pepper that’s scared; it’d be jalapeño business!
  • 🐉 Imagine a dragon who’s shy; its fire-breathing would be blushing flames.
  • 📦 Imagine a box that loves gifts; it’s always wrapped up in excitement!
  • 🧩 Imagine a puzzle missing pieces; it’d feel incomplete without a punchline.
  • 🥨 Imagine a pretzel at a dentist; it’d need a twist on the usual cleaning.

Komodo Dumbest Jokes

  • 🦎 Why did the Komodo dragon start a bakery? For its scaly rolls!
  • 🔥 Why did the Komodo bring a lighter? To ignite its appetite!
  • 👑 Why is the Komodo king of puns? It’s a reptile dysfunction!
  • 🚗 Why did the Komodo learn to drive? To take its scales on the road!
  • 🍖 Why did the Komodo go vegan? It was tired of being dragon its meals!
  • 🏊 Why did the Komodo join a pool? To practice its scale swimming!
  • 🎸 Why did the Komodo start a band? For its heavy metal scales!
  • 🧳 Why did the Komodo pack light? It hates scale-ing luggage!
  • 📚 Why did the Komodo write a novel? To share its terrible tales!
  • 🕺 Why did the Komodo go clubbing? It wanted to scale the dance floor!
  • 🎓 Why did the Komodo go to college? To study scale modeling!
  • 🥾 Why did the Komodo wear boots? To protect its scaly feet!
  • 🎯 Why did the Komodo join archery? It loves hitting the scale bullseye!
  • 🖼 Why did the Komodo visit the art gallery? To admire scale drawings!
  • 📸 Why did the Komodo get famous on Instagram? For its hiss-terical selfies!

How to Train Your Dumbest Jokes

  • 🏋️‍♂️ Step 1: Warm up with puns— they’re the core of dumb humor!
  • 📖 Step 2: Read one-liners daily— practice makes punchlines perfect!
  • 🗣 Step 3: Test on friends— if they groan, you’re on the right track!
  • 🎭 Step 4: Add dramatic pauses— because timing is everything!
  • 🖋 Step 5: Write them down— because even dumb jokes deserve ink!
  • 🤝 Step 6: Swap with fellow jokers— share the dumbness!
  • 📊 Step 7: Track reactions— note which ones get the biggest groans.
  • 🤹 Step 8: Learn to juggle jokes— keep them in air for surprise!
  • 🎵 Step 9: Put jokes to music— turn dumb into harmony!
  • 📸 Step 10: Record your set— watch the hilarious outtakes!
  • 🧠 Step 11: Study classic duds— everybody starts somewhere.
  • 🥇 Step 12: Reward yourself— celebrate every groan you earn!
  • 🔄 Step 13: Revise and repeat— because practice never kills.
  • 📅 Step 14: Schedule joke time— consistency is key!
  • Step 15: Embrace the worst— the dumber, the better!

Year of the Dumbest Jokes

  • 🎉 2025: A year of epic eye-rolls!
  • 🗓️ 2024: The dawn of pun-dernation!
  • 🥳 2023: Groans reached all-time highs!
  • 📆 2022: World’s first joke recession!
  • 📈 2021: Puns inflated by 200%!
  • 🦠 2020: Quarantine puns multiplied!
  • 🏔️ 2019: Climbed the comedy peak!
  • 🎬 2018: Movie puns stole the show!
  • 📱 2017: Viral dad jokes emerged!
  • 🎮 2016: Gaming puns leveled up!
  • 🐶 2015: Dog puns took the lead!
  • 🛸 2014: Alien puns abducted us!
  • 📚 2013: Book puns checked out!
  • 🏝️ 2012: Island puns beached us!
  • 🚗 2011: Car puns cruised to success!

House of the Dumbest Jokes

  • 🏠 Living Room: Couch potatoes tell the worst jokes.
  • 🍽️ Kitchen: Where puns cook themselves.
  • 🛏️ Bedroom: Nighttime jokes are in-snooze-ing.
  • 🚪 Hallway: Lots of passing punchlines.
  • 🚿 Bathroom: Best place for loo-d humor.
  • 🖼️ Gallery: Jokes always on exhibit.
  • 🔥 Fireplace: Jokes that spark laughter.
  • 🛋️ Den: Where dumb jokes lounge.
  • 🧹 Closet: Hidden gems of groaners.
  • 🖥️ Office: Where you work the jokes.
  • 🎮 Game Room: Puns are always on play.
  • 🎶 Music Room: Jokes in key.
  • 🏋️‍♀️ Gym: Flex your funny muscles.
  • 📖 Library: Quiet, until someone tells a pun.
  • 🌳 Backyard: Open-air ha-ha zone.

Dumbest Born Jokes

  • 👶 Born to be mild!
  • 🏥 Delivered at pun time!
  • 🥳 **First word: “Pun!” **
  • 🍼 Fed on dad jokes!
  • 🚼 Crib full of one-liners!
  • 🎂 **Birthday cake said, “I’m flat!” **
  • 🩺 **Doctor: “You’ve got the giggles!” **
  • 👣 **Baby’s first step: “Oops!” **
  • 🚼 **Diaper notes: “This stinks!” **
  • 🍼 **Bottle said, “Gulp!” **
  • 🎈 **Party hat: “I’m point-less!” **
  • 👶 **On naming day: “Call me Pun!” **
  • 🏷️ Tagged as the punniest!
  • 📸 **Photos: “Say groan!” **
  • 🎉 Welcome to the world of dumb!

Dumbest Jokes Clean

  • 🚗 Why did the broom get a ticket? It was sweeping too fast!
  • 🍎 What do you call a bear in the rain? Drizzly bear!
  • 🍞 Why did the slice of bread break up? It was in crumby shape!
  • 📚 Why was the math book sad? Too many problems!
  • Why don’t scientists trust atoms? They make up everything!
  • 🌞 Why did the sun go to school? To get brighter!
  • 🐶 Why do dogs run in circles? Because it’s hard to run in squares!
  • 🍫 Why did the candy go to school? To be a smartie!
  • 🛸 Why did the alien go to school? To get its space degree!
  • 🥤 Why did the soda can go to therapy? It had a pop complex!
  • 🏀 Why was the basketball court wet? Because people were dribbling!
  • 🎩 Why do magicians do laundry? To make their tricks clean!
  • 🐱 Why don’t cats play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs!
  • 🚲 Why can’t a bicycle stand up? It’s two-tired!
  • 🌳 Why did the leaf go to school? To get a little bark knowledge!

One Liner Dumbest Jokes

  • 🥚 Egg-cited to groan?
  • 🌭 Hot dog—bunbelievable!
  • 🪕 Banjo—string theory!
  • 🦢 Swan—feather weather!
  • 🍟 Fries—mashup!
  • 🎺 Trumpet—blow your mind!
  • 🍉 Melon—one-derful!
  • 🧀 Cheese—grate!
  • 🪁 Kite—high five!
  • 🍦 Cone—icesis!
  • 🐟 Tuna—fin-tastic!
  • 🥨 Pretzel—twist of fate!
  • 🐝 Bee—buzz-worthy!
  • 🌮 Taco—shell shocked!
  • 🥕 Carrot—root of all evil!

Dumbest Puns

  • 🍌 I’m bananas for you!
  • 🥖 That’s a sourdough thought!
  • 🍯 I’m stuck on you!
  • 🥚 That’s egg-cellent!
  • 🌶 You’re pepper-fect!
  • 🍫 You’re my sweet spot!
  • 🧊 I’m cool with that!
  • 🍯 You make me buzz!
  • 🥨 Let’s twist again!
  • 🍓 You’re berry nice!
  • 🍍 I’m pine-ning for you!
  • 🍅 I ketchup later!
  • 🍋 When life gives you lemons, make puns!
  • 🍇 That’s grape!
  • 🥥 You’re coco-nuts!

Short Jokes on Dumbest

  • 🤖 Beep boop—that’s dumb!
  • 🧀 Cheddar luck next time!
  • 🍒 Life’s a fruit!
  • 🌧 It’s raining puns!
  • 🎯 Bull-eye!
  • 🦷 Tooth be told—bad joke!
  • 🔑 Key-p groaning!
  • 🐍 Sly ly pun!
  • 🥾 Boot-iful fail!
  • 🚪 Knock-knock—still dumb!
  • 🦒 Tall tale!
  • 🍷 Wine-not laugh?
  • 🧩 Piece-ful morning!
  • 🎈 Air-y joke!
  • 🐸 Rib-bit moment!

Top Jokes About Dumbest

  • 🎖 “I’d tell you a dumb joke, but you’d get it!”
  • 🏆 “You’re so dumb, you thought a quarterback was a refund!”
  • 🥇 “You’re so dumb, you tried to climb Mountain Dew!”
  • 🏅 “You’re so dumb, you put lipstick on your forehead to make up your mind!”
  • 🎗 “You’re so dumb, you locked your keys inside a clear car!”
  • 🎟 “You’re so dumb, you sold your watch for time!”
  • 🎗 “You’re so dumb, you thought Taco Bell was a phone company!”
  • 🏵 “You’re so dumb, you tried to drown a goldfish!”
  • 🏵 “You’re so dumb, you thought a zebra was a horse with stripes!”
  • 🏵 “You’re so dumb, you stared at a cup of orange juice to see if it would concentrate!”
  • 🎖 “You’re so dumb, you thought Cheez Whiz was a mouse!”
  • 🎖 “You’re so dumb, you tried to put M&M’s on your eyes for see-nse!”
  • 🎖 “You’re so dumb, you returned a puzzle because it was missing a piece!”
  • 🎖 “You’re so dumb, you thought ID parade was a skin conditioner!”
  • 🎖 “You’re so dumb, you tried to surf the Internet with a surfboard!”

Dumbest Jokes for Adults

  • 🍸 Why did the cocktail blush? It saw the mixer undressing!
  • 🕴 Why don’t secret agents tell jokes? They’re on a need-to-“groan” basis.
  • 🥂 What’s a wine’s favorite joke? A dry humor!
  • 🍺 Why did the beer file a police report? It got stout-ted!
  • 🎲 Why don’t gamblers tell jokes? Too many stakes!
  • 💼 Why did the briefcase get promoted? It carried all the stress!
  • 📊 Why don’t analysts laugh? They data-mine the fun out of everything.
  • 🕶 Why did the sunglasses quit? They couldn’t handle the shade!
  • 🧥 Why did the blazer break up? It was too buttoned up.
  • 🎤 Why did the comedian retire? The crowd got too punch-drunk.
  • 🛋 Why don’t couch potatoes date? They’re too couch-bound.
  • 🖥 Why did the coder groan? Too many bugs!
  • 💳 Why did the credit card break up? It had too much interest!
  • 🥇 Why did the trophy groan? It was over-awarded.
  • 📅 Why did the calendar sigh? Its days were numbered!

Dad Dumbest Jokes

  • 👨‍👦 “I’m reading a book on anti-gravity—it’s impossible to put down!”
  • 👞 “I used to be a shoe salesman, but I just didn’t fit in.”
  • 🔋 “My battery died—I recharged my enthusiasm!”
  • 📞 “I got a job at the bakery because I kneaded dough.”
  • 🕰 “I’m on a seafood diet—I see food and I eat it!”
  • 🌳 “I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.”
  • 🔧 “I’m afraid for the calendar—its days are numbered.”
  • 🥪 “Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded? There was nothing left but de-brie.
  • 🧀 “Want to hear a joke about cheese? Never mind, it’s too gouda.”
  • 🦷 “I’m reading about anti-gravity—it’s impossible to put down! ”
  • 🎣 “I used to be a fisherman, but I couldn’t catch a break.”
  • 🍝 “I’m on a whiskey diet—I’ve lost three days already!”
  • 🧹 “I asked the broom if it was going to work today—it said it was sweeping something else up.”
  • 🥕 “I tried to catch fog yesterday—I mist.
  • 🗺 “I’m starting a business making yachts in my attic—sails are going through the roof.”

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